


Falling Feathers

by gremlinwriter



Series: Freedom [2]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Multi, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, POV Multiple, Pining, Unrequited Love, pairing tags may be added at one point
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-28
Updated: 2021-01-29
Packaged: 2021-03-14 04:01:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,396
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29039790
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gremlinwriter/pseuds/gremlinwriter
Summary: A companion piece toFlying Free, with chapters told from different views during the events of the main story. Not in chronological order.
Series: Freedom [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2068602
Comments: 39
Kudos: 164





	Falling Feathers

**Author's Note:**

> This chapter takes place at the end of chapter 9 and before chapter 10 of the main story, told first from Marco's and then Levi's point of view.
> 
> I really hope their POVs and the chapter turned out well!

They weren't coming back. The thought snuck into Marco's mind like the sharp icy winds got past his clothes and chilled his skin. He tried to shy away from it, but it didn't let go, until his breath hitched and his throat hurt while his eyes swam with unshed tears.

 _They're fine_ , he told himself. They had to be. Armin was smarter than he let on, Mikasa was ridiculously strong and Eren was brave and had survived every impossible situation so far. Surely they were fine. They probably just got lost, after taking down the night walking Titans. They had no lanterns and the clouds had covered the moon again, leaving the world pitch black. There was no way Eren and the others would find their tracks in this darkness and the falling snow would have made their tracks disappear by morning.

Swallowing hard, Marco tried to stay positive. Maybe they were going to show up any moment, like specters out of the dark. They had to be alright. Blinking hard against the tears, Marco felt a sudden hand gently touch his shoulder. Looking to the side, he saw Krista riding beside him, her eyes wide and dark with sorrow. After a second, she glanced away, guilt seeping into her expression, but she kept her hand where it was. Marco lifted his own hand, slightly shaky and covered hers with his.

"They'll be okay," he said, voice quiet and crackling slightly around the words. "I'm sure of it."

Krista looked back at him, hope and the beginnings of grief battling in her eyes. "I...I hope you're right."

"They know the way to Maria," Connie suddenly spoke up ahead of them and looked over his shoulder at them. "If they survive the Titans, they're probably going to make their way back to the city on their own or, if the snow gets too bad, they'll hunker down until morning and make their way to the city then. At least, that's what I would do. Either that or return to the outpost, if there are too many Titans around or someone's too hurt to make it."

Marco swallowed back his tears and tightly held onto his hope. Connie was right, Eren, Mikasa and Armin knew the way to the city, if they didn't show up again tonight, surely they'd find their way back to Maria on their own. And while Armin was still injured, he was doing better than weeks ago and if they didn't run into trouble, they should be able to make it.

Marco couldn't help but frown a bit, wondering why Armin had left to stay with Eren and Mikasa. Was it because they were childhood friends? They had mentioned being a trio since they had been kids. That sort of bond ran deep, maybe Armin couldn't have forgiven himself if he left them behind? Marco didn't know, but he'd ask as soon as the three were back. And scold them for being reckless, especially Armin. And hug them because he was still so worried about them his fingers shook.

Krista pulled her hand back with a last squeeze to his shoulder and Marco felt a little bit better. They rode on steadily, keeping a very sharp eye out on any more Titans. That Titans suddenly and unexpectedly moved around at night was frightening. Night time had been the one time where they had always been safe, where they could move without fear and kill off Titans around the walls. What if that had changed now? What if Titans _evolved_?

Shivering at that thought in dread, Marco quickly distracted himself by gently nudging his horse closer to the cart with the injured. Jean sat propped up at the side, wrapped in a blanket to stay warm and the hood of his cloak pulled up against the blowing snow. Jean's face was dark and Marco felt a pang in his chest, drowning out the affection and soft, quiet yearning that always filled his bones when he looked at his best friend.

"Jean," Marco said quietly and his friend visibly startled out of his thoughts, glancing up at him. "They'll be okay."

"Yeah ," Jean answered, wiping a hand over his face and Marco knew he tried to hide his worry and fear. "I'm sure you're right."

Leaning down and reaching out, he placed his hand on Jean's shoulder, feeling a surge of relief and warmth when tension seeped out of Jean and he slumped into his gentle grip.

"They'll be back before we know it," Marco said with a smile and watched as the corners of Jean's mouth twitched up reluctantly in a shadow of a smile. "I'm sure, by tomorrow they'll be back."

"They'll hear something from me," Jean grumbled, but it was good natured and the dark, grieving look on his face slowly lightened. He glanced up at Marco and gave him a small, soft smile, that he seemed to only reserve for him. Marco felt his heart skip a beat and he couldn't help but smile back right away. "Thanks, Marco."

"Always," Marco promised and with a last squeeze, pulled back. It wasn't comfortable at all to be bent at this angle while riding.

Sitting up again, Marco's gaze fell to the riders ahead of them. Past Connie and Sasha, he saw Erwin and Hanji. Levi and his squad were just barely visible, keeping a loose circle around them in case of any more attacks. 

Marco didn't know how he should feel about Erwin's decision to keep going without sending Levi and his squad to check on their friends. On one hand, he understood why their commander had given the order to move on. It was dark, snowing and they had no idea where Eren and the others ended up after their fight or if more Titans waited for them in the dark. They had injured comrades and friends to get to safety and anyone who stayed behind to look for Eren, Mikasa and Armin, was in danger of getting lost and not finding their way back to the group.

On the other hand, those were Marco's friends that had been essentially abandoned. His grip on his reins tightened. The only thing making him feel slightly better about a decision he could neither agree nor really disagree with, had been that Levi had offered to go anyway, saying that he wasn't stupid enough to get lost. Erwin had seriously considered his request for a moment, before shaking his head. If any more night walking Titans waited for them up ahead, they needed all the soldiers they had. With the snow and ice, the darkness of night and the bad weather, they couldn't ride as fast as they were used to. If anything attacked them, running away was even harder than usual and they risked the cart with the injured ones falling behind first.

Tucking his cloak more firmly around himself, Marco focused on the hope Connie had given him and his own stubborn believe that their friends were alright. They had survived a week in the wild already, before Mike and the others had found them. Surely they could do it again.

It felt like it took ages, until the wall of Maria finally came into view, the torches and fires lit atop the wall shining like a ring of beacons in the night. Marco couldn't help but exhale with relief, feeling chilled through and through and ready to finally get somewhere warm. And take a warm shower. God did he miss warm water.

They were let in swiftly and had to slow down further, when a garrison soldier warned them of ice in the streets. Without earth and grass, the cobblestone streets became rather slippery, but it wasn't bad enough yet that they had to dismount.

When they reached the survey corps headquarters of Maria, Marco felt ready to shuffle to bed and fall asleep right away, despite still feeling rather worried about their missing friends. As he dismounted, a zing of pain raced up his cold feet when they hit the ground, but that was rather normal for winter, unless they had amazingly good footwear.

The recruits left behind for training quickly came to take care of their horses and help the injured ones inside. Marco spotted Farlan and the other handful of doctors and nurses, as they directed the recruits and already started checking on the injured ones. Marco briefly met Jean's gaze, as his friend was bodily lifted out of the cart. His legs were still too hurt to walk on.

"Get some rest," Jean told him, face slightly tensing at being moved and his wounds most likely hurting. "See you tomorrow?"

"Absolutely," Marco promised and found himself ushered inside with his friends by Mike. Mike had been a great squad leader and Marco hoped that he'd end up in his squad again during any future expeditions. Knowing Erwin, the likelihood was high, especially if Mike spoke well of them too.

They were all ordered to bathe and warm up and head straight to bed. Feeling both exhausted and weirdly wired with worry for Eren, Mikasa and Armin, Marco shuffled after the others. There were barely no conversations, as they moved into the big showers after getting a spare set of clothes. Someone only occasionally spoke up to pass along soaps and later towels, before they got dressed again and headed for their rooms.

One of the good things about winter was that there were very rarely expeditions and while soldiers were expected to show up for duty, they were welcome to spend the nights at home and they had fewer work hours, unless there was some kind of emergency at the walls and their support was needed. Winter was quiet and calm and the only time the survey corps could ever be a bit lazy.

Falling into bed, Marco already looked forward to seeing his mother again and spending time at home, where he had a room of his own and was surrounded by the things he loved. Maybe Jean would stay over again, like he had a few times in the last years. Or he could stay at Jean's place, his mom was an absolute sweetheart.

Closing his heavy eyes, Marco couldn't help but send a mental prayer, praying for his friends' safety and that they would return to them. He couldn't, he refused to believe that they had died. Or that they were out there, injure and slowly freezing to death. Squeezing his eyes shut, Marco carefully took deep breath after deep breath, until he fell into fitful slumber.

~*~

Marco sat numbly in front of Erwin, staring at the slip of paper that rested beneath the man's big hands. Levi and Hanji were in the room as well, though standing back a bit. Levi stood by the windows, while Hanji leaned slightly over Erwin's desk, a serious expression on their face.

Their friends had lied to them. Marco didn't know how to feel about that, the only question on his head was _why_. Why lie? It was, incidentally also the question Erwin had.

"Did they mention anything to you?" Erwin prodded gently, but with a firmness behind the words that jolted Marco out of his sudden numbness. "Did they ask any questions? Did it seem like they were after something?"

"No," Marco said, glancing to the side where his other friends sat. Krista looked as shocked as he felt, while Sasha and Connie had furrowed their brows in confusion and serious thoughtfulness. "They only asked some normal things, like what holidays we liked to celebrate or how the survey corps spend the winter."

Why had their friends lied? Marco didn't get it. It didn't make any sense. Not when he thought of Eren, who had saved lives with little to no regard what would happen to his own. Not when he thought of Mikasa's unshaken loyalty to her friends and her quiet but firm help, her steady strength and sudden, unexpected sense of humor that she let shine through at times.

Not when he thought of Armin's gentle and friendly presence and the few stories he had told them. Jean had said that Armin was great company too, when they had been stuck in the same room, injured and recovering. Jean was getting questioned right now as well, though by Mike, who had gone to him in the hospital wing.

"Is there anything you can remember?" Hanji asked, looking at them with sharp, serious eyes. Sometimes it was easy to forget, that under all their jovial appearance and excitement over everything and anything Titan related, Hanji was one of the best soldiers of the survey corps. "Have they snuck around? Tried to break into any rooms?"

"No," Marco shook his head. He had noticed nothing of the sort.

"Eren left a few times at night," Sasha suddenly said. "At least, the few times I woke up when he opened the door. But I never saw him come back with anything. He might as well have been using the toilet."

Or what had acted as a toilet in the outpost. Plumbing wasn't really a thing at the moment, though Hanji had expressed hopes of installing it once they had secured the building and started on the next outpost, so they could finally, at one point, expand Maria's wall.

Marco noticed that Levi briefly glanced at Sasha at her words and then at Erwin, who looked back at the captain with a raised eyebrow. Something must have been communicated between the two, because Erwin looked back at them again.

"Anything else?" he asked and Marco tried to remember anything, but there was nothing. Neither Eren nor Mikasa or Armin had acted suspiciously. A bit naive about the ongoing of the survey corps, but that was to be expected, since they had only recently joined.

They all shook their heads and Erwin gave them a smile. "Thank you for your help. If you remember anything, don't hesitate to inform us or Mike."

They were dismissed with those words and after some respectful goodbyes, they left Erwin's office. Once the door closed behind them, they exchanged looks and Marco saw that his friends felt as blindsided, confused and a bit worried as he did.

"Why did they lie?" Krista spoke up first, her voice quiet and she looked a bit lost. "I don't understand."

"They weren't spies, that's for sure," Connie added, crossing his arms over his chest. "At least, I don't think so. I mean, what's there to spy for anyway? We're the survey corps, not the military police brigade. And spies don't sacrifice their lives the way Eren has. Or work as hard as Mikasa and Armin did."

"Maybe they had a good reason," Marco found himself saying and his friends glanced at him, gazes questioning. He gave them a helpless shrug. "Maybe they were lying because they had to protect something, or each other. I don't think that...they wanted to hurt us."

Sasha sighed heavily and rubbed a hand over her face. "Let's hope they come back soon, so we can ask them. Not knowing is killing me."

"Yeah," Krista agreed quietly and they slowly started walking again, heading down the hallway. "They said nothing weird to any of you?"

"No," Sasha shook her head and Connie and Marco did the same. Then she frowned. "But they were rather reluctant to talk about their past, so maybe you're right, Marco. Maybe there is something they're hiding. Or running from. Maybe they got into trouble in Rose and had to leave."

Marco thought it over and swallowed against his dry throat. In a quiet voice, he admitted, "If it's nothing bad, I don't care that they lied." He glanced up at his friends. "I just want them to be okay."

Connie sighed and swayed to the side, gently bumping their shoulders together. "Me too. I mean, I'm kind of angry that they lied to us, didn't trust us, whatever, but I'm willing to hear them out."

Krista nodded. "I'm sure there is an explanation and everything can be cleared up."

"Yeah," Sasha shoved her hands into the pockets of her pants and then grinned at them. "I'll forgive them if they give me their breadrolls for a week."

Connie broke out into laughter and Marco and Krista found themselves chuckling as well. Sasha's face lit up a bit and she gave them a warm grin that crinkled the corners of her eyes. The tense mood was effectively broken and Marco felt his shoulders relax a bit.

As they went down the stairs and towards the canteen, Marco took a step away from his friends. "I'll go visit Jean and talk to him."

"Sure, let us know if he knows anything. Or don't, we'll visit him after lunch," Connie said and kept on walking with Sasha, while Krista turned around and gave him an encouraging smile and two big thumbs up.

Marco immediately felt his face heat a bit and he quickly ducked his head. Krista had figured out how he felt for Jean a little while ago, but she had kept it secret at his request. Sometimes Marco suspected that Sasha knew too, but she never said anything and Connie never seemed to care, as long as his friends were happy and healthy.

Not that Marco was going to say anything. He treasured his friendship with Jean far too much. They had gone through quite a bit together throughout the years and he couldn't imagine a life without his best friend at his side. That he loved him seemed almost like a side-fact at this point, if not for the moments where Marco found himself reminded all over again why he fell in love with Jean in the first place, or when his heart decided to climb into his throat and make itself known loudly.

When he knocked at the room Jean stayed in for the time, he was told to enter. Mike wasn't there, which meant their conversation had finished already. Jean looked relieved to see him and his face was a mixture of angry frustration and helpless confusion.

"Why did they lie to us?" Jean asked, while Marco sat down in the chair at his bedside. He rubbed over his face roughly. "What the hell."

"I don't know," Marco said quietly and resisted the urge to reach out and take hold of Jean's restless hands. If he had been healthy, Jean would probably be pacing, giving his pent up frustrations a bit of an outlet. "But the others and I were questioned too and none of us can think of anything suspicious."

Jean threw up his hands, looking angry and somewhat exhausted. "That's what I mean! Eren jumped after me _into a Titan_. Who the fuck _does_ that?"

"Not a spy, that's for sure," Marco added and Jean gestured at him as if he'd gotten exactly his point.

"I just don't get it," Jean said and then exhaled roughly, sinking back into the pillows at his back and deflating slightly. Now he just looked confused and kind of hurt. "Why did they lie? I mean, I get if they lied to Erwin or something, but to us? I thought," he pressed his lips together, falling quiet. _I thought we were friends_ , went unspoken.

This time, Marco couldn't help but reach out, gently touching Jean's arm with one hand and giving him a sad, understanding smile.

"I know, I feel the same way. But until they return, I don't think we're going to find any answers." Marco tried to ignore the voice in the back of his head that said _what if_. What if they don't come back, what if they're dead, what if you let them die.

"Not unless Erwin digs anything up," Jean sighed and glanced at him. His brows furrowed slightly and he shifted his arm to take Marco's hand for a brief, gentle squeeze. Jean's grip wasn't perfect, the angle of their fingers a bit awkward, but his touch was steady and grounding. Marco felt his heart flutter at the way their calluses pressed together and strong fingers wrapped around his, skin warm and a bit rough from the cold season.

"Hey," Jean said, softly in a way he only really was around Marco, a privilege that Marco kept tucked close to his heart. "They're okay, right? You said so yourself. Our friends are probably going to show up by tonight, tomorrow at the latest, with some dumb story and another reckless thing Eren did. And when we're done yelling at them for being idiots and we let them make it up to us and let them explain why they lied."

"Yeah," Marco agreed and felt a small smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. His hand, now resting on his knee, felt like it tingled a bit from Jean's touch. "They'll be back soon."

Jean reached out and ruffled his hair, surprising Marco and he chuckled at the gentle touch. 

"See?" Jean said. "Everything's going to be fine."

Marco chose to believe him, ignoring the whispers in the back of his head, the guilt that clung to the corners of his heart and the worry and fear that clung to his heels like a quiet, patient shadow. Their friends had to be alright and they would be back soon. They had to be alive and alright, because anything else meant that they had died protecting them. Had died alone in the dark, with no backup coming.

* * *

Levi watched as the door closed behind the soldiers and silence descended upon the room. A glance at Erwin showed that he had laced his fingers together in front of his face and his brows were furrowed in thought. Hanji picked up the strip of paper again, the message from Rose, that said no one named Eren, Mikasa or Armin had left the city in the past months. There were no logs of their names at the gates, which either meant they had been hired illegally and they hadn't been traveling with actual traders, or something else had happened. People didn't just hang out outside the walls, it was too dangerous, especially without enough gas and blades to take care of Titans.

"We had a feeling they weren't entirely truthful with us and now we know why," Erwin spoke up, voice even and calm and his eyes filled with cool calculation. His brows furrowed a tad further. "Though we still don't know why they lied to us. I'll write to Rose again and ask them if they can pull any records for those three, maybe they were involved with illegal business."

Erwin didn't care if that was the case, especially considering Levi's colorful past, as well as Isabel and Farlan's. Levi was also reasonably certain that a couple other soldiers came from less than respectable backgrounds. Not that he cared, as long as people knew what to do and didn't abandon their cause.

In all honesty, hiding a checkered past or maybe even running from owning someone a lot of money made more sense than considering that Eren and his friends might have been spies of some sort. For one, the survey corps were the worst place to spy on. They had funding, but they weren't a rich division and they always headed out to fight Titans. They didn't really have secrets either, anything they found out they openly shared with other researchers, since their main goal was to make things easier for humanity and to win against Titans.

But if Eren and the others had been afraid of being turned away or even put in prison, lying would have made sense. Levi's brow furrowed. But why the lie about traders and not something else? They must have known that it wouldn't hold the second Erwin said he'd write to Rose. Something didn't add up here, but Levi couldn't figure out what piece he was missing.

"You think they're still alive?" Hanji asked, leaning their hip against Erwin's desk and handing him back the strip of paper.

Erwin hummed thoughtfully and then cast a questioning glance Levi's way. "You know them better, from what you've told. What do you think, Levi?"

Levi had mentioned talking to Eren a few times at night, though not much else, since quite frankly, there wasn't much else to say that Erwin didn't already know. Everyone knew of the stunts Eren had pulled and how Mikasa and Armin had positively surprised Mike with their own skills. And the times Eren had joined him as he drank tea, Levi could honestly say that nothing had seemed out of the ordinary. Aside maybe from Eren wanting to spend time with him in the first place.

Levi had kept himself from wondering what had happened to the trio so far. He had had to keep a cool head and focus on his job, focus on getting everyone to Maria safely. But now Erwin asked and Levi had to think back to last night, to what he knew of Eren and Mikasa and Armin, though the latter had been injured. His chest felt tighter at the memory, but he kept his breath even and his voice steady with long practice. It wasn't the first time he'd seen people, comrades die and wouldn't be the last. Even if, maybe, he had started to like Eren quite a bit towards the end.

Only...if he was honest, they might not have bitten the dust yet.

"There is a chance they're still alive," he said and ignored the misty sensation of quiet, tentative hope that filled his lungs. "They've proven themselves skilled and resourceful and they've survived a week out there alone before."

Erwin hummed thoughtfully and glanced at Hanji. "Would you mind informing the garrison to keep an eye out for possible stragglers? If they see our three missing soldiers approach, they should help them get to Maria safely."

"Sure," Hanji straightened with a nod and left the room with long, measured steps.

Erwin glanced back at Levi and he looked less like their commander now and more like his friend. Levi spotted the difference at the way the corners of Erwin's eyes relaxed a bit, his shoulders lowered a tad and his face seemed a bit more open now. "Anything else you'd like to tell me, Levi?"

Levi knew what Erwin meant. It had been a long time since Levi had spent time with people that weren't his friends or his squad. He wasn't exactly approachable and he liked it that way most of the time. And it was even rarer for Levi to genuinely start liking someone.

He didn't know what to say though. That aside from Farlan, he had never met someone who genuinely enjoyed sitting quietly with him, while he drank tea and took his time? That Eren seemed to enjoy his sense of humor, which was really fucking rare in and of itself? That he had wanted to save the guy and his friends?

Levi had learned years ago that he wasn't a hero, no matter what anyone else said, no matter who called him humanity's strongest. No matter how fast he was or how strong, there were always people he couldn't save, people he had to watch die, dead ones he had to leave behind. Survival was cruel and unforgiving and he had learned to harden his heart a long time ago.

Eren had been someone unexpected. He was unafraid and yet somewhat slightly worried all the time, fiercely loyal and caring for his friends and yet so willing to open up to others. To Levi even. He hadn't missed that the guy liked to spend time with him, how he had perked up when he had spotted Levi sitting at that shitty table. Eren, with his clear, watchful and strangely kind eyes, had been new and different and if the world had been cruel again, he might be all snuffed out now. Dead in some Titan's stomach.

Levi kept a straight face and shook his head. There was nothing to say. 

Erwin's face softened slightly. "Well, I'm here if you want to talk. You can stay if you want, but I'll get to writing a proper letter to Rose to explain everything." He paused. "Do you think we can send a courier? It's going to be too heavy for a bird."

Levi tilted his head slightly. "Depends on the snow and the courier would need an escort."

They both glanced to the window and where the snow had kept falling steadily throughout the night, covering everything in ankle deep white. It showed no signs of stopping, if anything, the flakes had grown into tufts of white, like small feathers that fell from the sky. Sending a courier in that weather was dangerous. Snow would keep piling up, making the journey more and more difficult, even with horses. And a thick blanket of snow meant they were too slow to run from Titans. Erwin didn't look to happy and sighed.

"I'll see what I can do, but if worse comes to worst, we'll need to wait until spring." He turned to grab a blank piece of paper. "I guess the least I can do is getting that letter done ahead of time."

Levi pushed away from the window and walked past the desk. "I'll take my leave then. If you need me, I'll either be in my room or at Isabel and Farlan's."

"Sure, have fun," Erwin said, but he sounded absentminded and the scratch of pen on paper filled the quiet.

Levi let himself out of his friend's office and closed the door quietly, before heading down the hallway. Isabel and Farlan were waiting for him in the entrance hall, both dressed in civilian clothes and thick coats. Their faces brightened at seeing him.

"You're good to leave?" Levi asked Farlan as he caught up to them.

"Everyone is already on the mend," Farlan said. "There is nothing serious that I would be needed for and if something does happen, they'll know where to get me."

Levi hummed in understanding and they headed outside together, a blast of cold ice and thick snowflakes greeting them. Farlan ducked further into the collar of his coat, but there was a smile on his face and he inhaled deeply to exhale and watch his breath fog in front of his face. Isabel grinned and tilted her head back, sticking out her tongue to try and catch some of the flakes, but they kept blowing back with her exhales.

"Hold your breath," Levi suggested and when she did, she was finally successful, face happy and just a tiny bit smug.

Levi was quietly glad to see his friends happy and whole. Their life hadn't exactly started out well, but aside from the constant possibility of death out in the field, it was better now. Levi and Isabel kept an easy pace, so Farlan didn't have to walk fast. His leg always got worse in the cold, but it didn't seem to bother him much right now.

Levi had to admit that the moment he thought he was about to lose his two oldest and at the time dearest friends, was one of the few things he had nightmares about, the rare night he slept a bit longer. Farlan always tried to get him to sleep more when he had some time off or during winter, but habits were hard to break and Levi was anything but keen on dealing with nights full of nightmares. The horrors didn't stop after all and at one point, he had taught himself to push them far enough back that he could think without shit clouding his head.

They reached Isabel and Farlan's house soon, since they had gotten one close to the headquarters. It was Levi's home too, in a way. They hadn't exactly asked him if he wanted to live with them, but the house had three bedrooms, one they had given to him and all his things had ended up here over time. It was nice, to have a place that was familiar and home, shared with one of the few people he thought of as family.

"Everything alright?" Farlan asked quietly after they knocked snow off their boots and entered, hands already reaching for their coats to take them off. "You're quieter than usual."

"I'm fine," Levi said and Farlan huffed softly.

"You always say that. Come on, we have a surprise for you."

"More like Farlan has," Isabel said, hopping in place for a moment to pull off her last boot and putting on her slippers. "I was with you after all."

Feeling slightly puzzled, Levi followed Farlan into the kitchen and saw five tin containers on the table. The different teas he used to mix his personal blend.

"Thank you, I've been running out," Levi said, picking up one of the containers. Farlan had even bought them from his preferred company. Not that there were many, but he always liked to get that particular herb from the traders of Shiganshina. The city was one of the smallest, but they had some quality produce that made trade with them rather popular.

"I noticed that you were getting low," Farlan said, limping over to the kitchen counter and rolling up his sleeves. He smiled at Levi over his shoulder and nodded to the cupboard where Levi kept his tea and cups. "So I thought it was a good surprise to return to."

Levi pulled his travel tea box out of his pocket and set it down, before he picked up the new tins. He stowed them in his cupboard, not yet mixing them together. He still had some of his old mix left and he'd use that up first. Picking his old mix, he went and refilled his travel box.

"I've never seen you with that little left after a trip," Isabel remarked from across the table and Levi glanced up to see her handing a pack of flour to Farlan. She looked surprised and curious. "Have you been drinking more?"

No, but he had been sharing, which wasn't something he usually did. There were only a small handful of people in his life who he would share his tea with and two of those didn't even like it. Isabel wasn't much of a tea drinker and Hanji always complained that his mix lacked a kick of some sort. Farlan and Erwin however, liked to join him for the occasional cup. His squad liked his tea as well, though Levi suspected that Oluo couldn't care less for tea and only drank it because Levi served it. Though even then, Levi rarely shared his tea while out on an expedition.

Not that he got a lot of chances to drink tea while out in the field. He did have his small tea box and a tin mug with him for when they roughed it, but most expeditions tended to end in blood and terror, so there was little time to really stop and take the time to enjoy a cup of tea.

"Let me make you some," Isabel offered and slipped the mix from his hands. "And Farlan's right, you're kind of quiet."

Levi would argue that he was often quiet, but his oldest friends knew him well.

"Bad expedition?" Farlan asked quietly and Isabel frowned while measuring leaves into a cup, before her expression cleared.

"Oh, those guys we lost at the end," she said, just as quietly and peered at Levi with a spark of concern in her eyes. "Did you like them?"

One of them, Levi almost said. He hadn't spoken much with Mikasa or Armin, though if they had died, their early demise would be a tragedy. And while Levi was good at compartmentalizing and keeping a cool and focused mind, he couldn't quite get Eren and his two friends out of his head. Mostly Eren, though, if he was utterly honest.

Isabel set the cup down in front of him with a clack and a smile. "Here, this will make you feel better."

Levi couldn't help but huff in wry amusement. His friends had once joked that as long as Levi had tea, he'd walk anything off, even a broken leg. Isabel was right though, when he took a sip, careful of the hot liquid. It did make him feel better. Grounded and settled.

"Do you want my help?" Levi asked as Isabel joined Farlan by the kitchen counter, bringing him more ingredients for what he was going to cook up. Farlan waved him off and Isabel gave him a bright smile.

"Just take it easy, boss," she said with a small teasing undertone to her voice. "Let us take care of things for a bit."

With a noncommittal hum, Levi settled into a chair at the table and took another sip. His gaze fell to the window and the thickly falling snow and he hoped that Eren and his friends had managed to survive. That, wherever they were, they were alright and would make their way to Maria sooner or later. Maybe he'd invite the guy on a cup of tea, once he was done giving him a shake down for being stupid and lying to them in the first place.

Isabel hummed as she took over kneading the dough and Farlan started cutting things up. Taking another sip, Levi exhaled softly, as he admitted something to himself. He had gone and had gotten a bit attached, hadn't he? That wasn't something he did and yet, Eren had somehow managed to slide past some of his defenses, unbothered by Levi's level stare and his tendency to stay quiet unless he had something to say. Maybe it had just been a while since the last time someone had just accepted him the way he was, even if Eren had been a bit nervous in the beginning, but that was rather normal for new recruits. 

Levi briefly closed his eyes, listening to his friends putter about and the scent of his tea wafting up to his face. Quietly, in the privacy of his own mind, Levi hoped that Eren was alright, that he somehow had managed to survive, along with his friends.

He really wasn't in the mood for grief.

**Author's Note:**

> As usual, there might be mistakes that I overlooked and I'll go read over the chapter again in the following days, seeing what slipped past me.
> 
> Next chapter: Jean's POV when he got swallowed by a Titan and saved by Eren in chapter 7 of the main story. Jean's POV will contain heavy panic attacks and a near death experience, so be aware of that and take care of yourselves.


End file.
